The Other Hate Crime

I thought this was an insightful article: http://contexts.org/socimages/2009/08/14/guest-post-dead-girls/

Usually, violence against a group of people (based on race, religion, nationality, etc.) is billed as a hate crime, and the perpetrator is vilified as a cruel, irrational bigot. However, violence against women often seems to escape this label.

This post looks at the George Sodini murder spree in the women's aerobics class. The author points out how much attention the murderer receives, and how he's painted as being a victim--a victim of the women who never paid attention to him, against whom he plotted this ghastly revenge.


Oh, a bonus--here's a bitter explanation of how feminism can be blamed for the whole thing.

With this perfect finale, the cheers and the ballyhoo...

...who wouldn't be happier?

So, I couldn't be happier,

Because happy is what happens,

When all your dreams come true...

Well, isn't it?

In this song, "Thank Goodness" from Wicked, Glenda is celebrating her impending marriage. But she seems to be using some strange language to do so: "Finale"? Earlier she uses "Happy Ending." And what about the uneasy question, the one that throws everything into doubt: "Well, isn't it?"

Unfortunately, many women share Glenda's understanding of marriage. It is supposed to be the finale, the happy ending, the ultimate high point in a woman's life.

For instance, one of my Facebook friends recently answered a survey that asked, "Where was your profile picture taken?" Hers was from her wedding day, but her reply read, "On the best day of my life."

Really? The best of her entire life? Does she plan on dying promptly, or does she simply plan on never having another wonderful day?

Of course, men aren't exempt from this wedding = the end phenomenon. The internet is inundated with sympathetic merchandise for the poor groom-to-be, who (as this site suggests) has been shanghaied into an engagement and now must survive through a four-hour party at which he takes the backseat to his bride. At least that night he'll finally gets some guilt-free sex, right?

Consider some of these images: Dead Man Walking? Doomed? Game Over? The multiple pleas for alcoholic aenesthesia before the big day?

If marriage is such a terrible end to all your good times, why bother? In general, men still determine when as engagement is set, and few people still frown on premarital sex, so why do men marry at all? (Oh, wait...that "love" thing.)

Yet the difference between the end of the groom's life-as-he-knows-it and the end of the bride's. For the groom, it's a joke: his party days are over, his wild oats have been sown--you know the rhetoric. However, his intellectual or career pursuits remain. Men seldom consider their wedding to be the high point of their life, and (while I could be mistaken), rarely refer to their wedding day as the best day of their lives. Indeed, men generally don't reach their peak (at least in the eyes of society) until late middle-age: after they've completed their education and established careers. Consider, for instance, this piece run by The Washington Post on the difference between men and women's "marriage market value."

For too many women, a wedding represents the zenith of life. There lingers an expectation that women will spend their whole youth dreaming, preparing, scheming, and doing whatever else it takes to get to their wedding day. (Sarah Haskins has a hilarious Target Women on this topic.)

More than likely, they will spend more money on this event than any other in their life--sometimes in amounts equivalent to the cost of a new car or the down payment on a house. They'll diet and exercise unlike ever before, just to be in shape for that one day, many without any well-devised plan to remain in shape when she no longer needs to squeeze into her dress.

For many women, after the honeymoon, it's an ambiguous blur of buying towels-houses-cars, raising children, 7 am goodbye-kisses, tax-paying, Disney Worlding, lawn-mowing...any number of activities, good or bad, traditional or progressive.

However, there are no more best days, for the high point has past. Women often hold their wedding portraits to be the epitome of their youth and vitality, and any difference between the wedding-day face and their own is usually marked with regret.

I'm not against marriage, I'm certainly not against Love, and I do believe that one's relationships with others (partners, children, parents, best friends) should be the most important parts of our lives.

But Love should be the centerpiece of our entire lives, which we continue to nurture and develop, along with our careers, our educations, our passions. It should not be the means to an end, to achieving the single grand accomplishment of a "perfect finale" wedding day, in the light of which all other successes and happinesses seem dim.

Glenda declares that Happy is what happens when all your dreams come true. But when a woman marries, all of her dreams have not come true. Perhaps one dream--beginning life with a person she loves--has come true, but she should continue to foster hopes, set goals, and seek Love in its many incarnations.

Now I'm shining too...

I think the lyrics to this song are perfect, especially for today. ♥



Falling in Love at a Coffee Shop

I think that possibly, maybe I’m falling for you
Yes there’s a chance that I’ve fallen quite hard over you.
I’ve seen the paths that your eyes wander down
I want to come too…

I think that possibly, maybe I’m falling for you

No one understands me quite like you do
Through all of the shadowy corners of me

I never knew just what it was
About this old coffee shop I love so much
All of the while I never knew…
Ahh…

I think that possibly, maybe I’m falling for you
Yes there’s a chance that I’ve fallen quite hard over you.
I’ve seen the waters that make your eyes shine
now I’m shining too

Because, oh because
I’ve fallen quite hard over you

If I didn’t know you, I'd rather not know
If I couldn’t have you, I'd rather be alone

I never knew just what it was
About this old coffee shop I love so much
All of the while, I never knew
I never knew just what it was
About this old coffee shop I love so much
All of the while, I never knew

All of the while,
All of the while it was you...

Why Wait Until She's in Junior High?

You can ruin your child's body image today!

You can also objectify her before she reaches puberty and sexualize her in a manner that's nothing short of pedophilic!

Apparently this show has been around for a while, but I just saw it for the first time on VH1 this week. After fifteen minutes, I felt physically ill.

There are precious few at ease with moral ambiguities...

(so we act as though they don't exist.)


I'm responding to the heart-sickening intolerance being presented as Christianity, particularly in the issue of premarital sex.

This issue highlights a confusing paradox propagated by much of the Christian faith, for the arguments against premarital sexual activity physicalize Love in a way that directly contradicts Christianity's normally spiritual understanding of humanity.

Unlike most arguments for these things, I'm going to delve into the metaphysical for a little while, and I'm going to call on the wealth of information I accumulated during my time as a devout Christian--a time now long past. But note: I am only using scripture to identify the tenants of Christianity, not to support my own argument. I have great respect for the Bible as a powerful literary and historical work, but any responses that depend solely upon scripture for their support will be, at best, ineffectual.


Running the risk of sounding like St. Augustine--how do the body and soul interact? Are they inextricably connected, the life of one depending upon the other? Is the soul a simple evolutionary imagining to help us deal with the daunting mystery of death?

Or does the soul inhabit the body like a man wears a coat, or a wine fills a bottle--as mainstream Christianity claims?

Christianity purports that the soul is distinct from the body. It can, of course, be influenced or led astray by the body, but in the end, the soul abandons the body and moves forward to heaven.

"Then shall the dust return to the earth as it was: and the spirit shall return unto God who gave it." (Ecclesiastes 12:7)

It is because of our souls that we can commune (through Christ) with God.

It is because of our souls that we must protect and consecrate our bodies, for they must remain together until we die--hence Christianity's obsession with abstinence prior to marriage.

I do not think there is anything wrong with waiting until marriage to have sex. It is a good way to avoid many physical complications and minimize (but not eliminate) heartache.

But many Christians have turned good advice into a moral crusade, which targets mostly young women. Dressed in wedding white, prepubescent girls accompany their fathers to Purity Balls. They don purity rings, publicly announcing their virginity. Boys and girls alike sign abstinence pledges, often with less-than-ideal results.

People have poured millions of dollars, innumerable hours, and incredible energy into to preventing young people from committing a single physical act. Once you have sex, assuming you're unmarried, it seems the game is up.

This kind of abstinence-only education teaches boys and girls that their value as a human is largely, if not entirely, physical. It teaches that if you are not a virgin, you are less deserving of a loving and caring partner, and it is a serious problem when virginity is used to assign a person value.

I have read terribly cruel and judgmental things on abstinence-only or True Love Waits forums:

I will never marry a man who isn't a virgin.

Of course he didn't marry her--she gave it up too soon. She's all used up. No one wants a recycled woman.

The Ultimate Wedding Gift....Your Virginity.

The problem with these assertions is that they use only one factor to determine a person's identity: sexual experience.

To address the first statement, even if a person clings to the Christian ideals of premarital abstinence, it seems remarkably unkind (and un-Christian) to reject a possible love-match simply because he miss-stepped in the past. If a Christian believes that God has destined one man to be her own, she had better hope that he has happened to live the same ascetic lifestyle she has. In other words, new converts with previous sexual experience are out of luck.

This suddenly makes the selection of romantic / marriageable partners entirely physical. A person's suitability is not determined by the history of his soul: his kindness, his generosity, his faithfulness, his altruism. It's determined solely by the history of the piece of flesh between his legs.

Is that, then, Love?

(Interestingly, this kind of statement also suggests that it is more appropriate to two disinterested virgins to marry each other than for a genuinely affection virgin and non-virgin to marry.)

Of course he didn't marry her--she gave it up to soon. She's all used up. No one wants a recycled woman.

For now, I'll ignore the misogynistic undertones of this statement, which was made in response to a teenage boy leaving his girlfriend after she gave birth to their child, instead of keeping their previous engagement.

I certainly do not think a couple should marry just because the woman becomes pregnant. However, this statement assumes that the woman is now unmarriable (read: worthless) because she has engaged in premarital sex.

Moreover, it flies in the face of Christianity's most important tenant: Forgiveness.

"Forgive anyone who does you wrong, just as Christ has forgiven you." (Colossians 3:13)

Apparently, sexual sin is not severe enough to keep a person out of heaven, but it is too severe to overlook in a potential marriage partner--even in the mother of your child.

I understand that man's love cannot equal divine love, but isn't the point of Christianity to try? Moreover, the notion that a woman is "used up" after having sex makes her value entirely physical. Since her other virtues do not seem to matter, a Christian woman might do better to sit in her bed, doing nothing but guarding her half-inch hymen. Why try to foster charity, industriousness, honesty, even spiritual strength, if in one moment of genuine human passion it might all be discarded? Again, a person's value has been weighed against a single physical act:

Is that, then, Love?

(Because I can't help it: This comment does not evaluate the teenage boy in any way. Though he necessarily had sex as well, he is not condemned. Instead, his decision to leave her is praised and justified. A nice lucid example of the ever-lurking double-standard.)

The Ultimate Wedding Gift....Your Virginity.

This was on a billboard for coolvirginity.com's abstinence campaign.

I think that saving one's virginity for marriage can be a wonderful and loving thing to do. It can make the experience more valuable simply because you've waited for it, because you've put love and patience above immediate physical satisfaction--but not because its increases your worth as a wife or husband (or as a person).

Virginity is a temporary thing, not something your husband or wife gets to keep. Indeed, virginity is not a something that exists but a negative state, a name given to the absence of sexual experience--but I'll leave it to Mr. Compson to debate the metaphysics of virginity.

Once again, the physical has trumped the spiritual. An intact bride is more important than an honest, loving, faithful bride; a virgin husband is more valuable than an honest, loving, faithful husband.

Shouldn't the ultimate wedding gift be...um...yourself?

Or, heaven forbid, your unconditional love?

A Poem for Frank

In Dr. Walker's poetry class this week, she brought a bag of conversation hearts. Everyone drew one without looking, and the message had to be the title of a poem. Mine read "Luv Me," and this is what I wrote--it's pretty ridiculous, and it's for Frank. ♥

(I had to eat the heart, of course, since it was melting in my fingers, but I found a very convenient picture of the same exact heart!)

Happy Valentine's Day!

(original picture at http://flickr.com/photos/7708642@N06/2261061447)

SPOGG!

Hurray! One of my favorite bloggers, SPOGG, posted an image I sent them:

This Might Explain a High Divorce Rate

All of the commentary is theirs--I just thought the mistake was hilarious.

Drill, Drill, Drill

I ripped this off of Brandie, but I think it's definitely worth considering.

Drill, Drill, Drill

♥ Ringo ♥

Ringo Quotes

Aw, man! I love this guy!

The List

A few years ago, when I wanted to cheer Melissa up, I made a list of all the things that Melissa and I find cheerful, interesting, or funny (mostly funny!). Since then, we've expanded it, adding to it regularly--it now has over 700 items!

It desperately needs to be updated, but since we've become roommates, it's hard to keep track of all the things that should be put on The List:

Ah!
Alex’s ridiculous use of vocabulary
Alice in Wonderland
Alliteration!
And by un-meet, I mean kill.
Any time does not mean all the time
Apologize to her
Appetizers at Outback
Apple Dandy
Arabs
Aragorn forgot to get directions from Gandalf before he fell.
Aragorn singing Old Glory at his coronation
Arkham Asylum for the Criminally Insane
Attending Oxford
Baby wookies
Bad southern accents
Baking cheesesticks at 4 am
Barbecues
Bare feet
Basically
Bath crayons
Batman Begins
Batman Cards
Batman fruit snacks
Batman villains
Bbuild me an army worthy of Mordor!
Beauty and the Beast
Because I thought somebody believed in me.
Being a Professor of Tolkien
Big hair
Big Head
Bilbo
Bilbo's birthday being celebrated by the Fellowship shortly after the Battle of Amon Hen.
Birthdays
Bonsoir
Bootstraps Bootstraps Bootstraps Bootstraps Boostraps’ Bootstraps
Boromir cannot make his own s'mores.
Boys Don’t Cry poster
Boys…don’t…cry-i-i
Brandy
Brian is Batman
Burlap
Bursting into song
Business cards
But I bought her a bottle for witchcraft!
But I’m Gandalf! Well, you should have thought about that before you missed the boat!
But the Batman…he has a talent for disruption
Button!
Buttons
Calling someone you trust
Candy corn
Cappuccinos
Captain Jack Sparrow
Car stickers
Caring for someone
Charitable
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
Cheese
Cheesesticks
Chimelle
Chocolate
Chocolate coffee
Christopher saying, “It’s not true!”
Clancy
Coconut coffee
Coffee
Coffee & Crane
Coffee & Crane for the Criminally Insane
Coffee Nirvana
Communication Demon
Cool Points System
Cool…cool…
Corn-Toothed King
Cousins Reed
Craaaaazy!
Crazy Robert Smith pictures…including one with short shorts
Creepy boys asking Dr. LaCour out to dinner
Crescent moons
Crickets
Crones
Crooning Beatle
Customizing Livejournal
Damn them. Damn them all the hell.
Damn Yankee bastards!
Dancing
Dancing camels
Dancing in the middle of the driveway
Dancing like Ulysses
Dangly earrings
David reading the The List all the way through
David wanting to be on The List
Day moons
Day Tripper!
Dear Willy Wonka
Death by ham
Decorated notebooks
Decorated socks
Defeating cockroaches
Delightful
Did I mention coffee?
Digital camera
Dinosaur Comics
Dirktions
Discovering a little bit of strength still exists
Disney movies
Disney songs
Disney World
Do what you like, only free her!
Do you like my belt? It’s studded. Yeah. I do like your belt. It is studded.
Do you like my makeup? It’s dots. Yeah. I do like your makeup. It is dots.
Do you like my new bathing suit?
Do you want some panties?
Doderick the Hop-Toad
Does this have caffeine in it?
Donut math
Doom room
Dr. Anderson is Superman
Dr. Crane
Dr. Crane isn’t here right now, but if you would like to make an appointment…
Dr. Daffron living in the chapel
Dr. Daffron’s “Hey,” with wave
Dr. Keller
Dr. LaCour
Dr. LaCour reading the manual to the copier
Dr. LaCour’s lists
Dr. Pepper
Dragging Michael to the other side of town to make him see Batman Begins
Dreams
Drinking out of specific coffee mugs
Drives home
Driving each other insane with Phantom of the Opera music
Driving home deliriously
Driving my family insane with Phantom of the Opera music
Driving on the interstate
Drowning in a sip of water
Drunk older brothers
DuCard Card
DuCard’s poor grammar
Duck hunting
Ducks
Dupre
Dusk
DVD releases
Early morning phone calls
Earning a degree
Easy Mac
Ebeniezer Frog!
Ebeniezer the Hop-toad
Eeeee! That’s how they met.
Eighties clothes
Elphaba: One Woman Show!
Elrond angers his mother by going over his cell phone minutes
Elves
Emails
Emo videos
Engagements
English
Entering a time-warp to get to Wal-Mart
Especially if it’s your girlfriend
Ethan Peru
Even more better! It’s a drawing of a key.
Evening, ladies. How ya’ll doing?
Evil hole punch
Except Alex
Exploded shrimp
Extended editions
Extravaganza!
Eyeliner
Faeries
Fairy tales
Falling Crow
Fat Chubbs
Fatty fat fat fatty fat walrus!
Fiddle number from Pirates of the Caribbean
Filch's hobble
Finding Neverland
Finding Taco Bell closed at 4 am
Finding the sugar and the cake server for Stephanie
First kiss
Fish and Hearts
Five-hour baking sessions
Flaxes
Flets
Flich’s cannon!
Forgetting Enlish
Forgetting McCarthyism
Forgetting The Princess Bride. Twice.
Forgetting things we DEFINITELY said
Frag Ileman Street
Fragile Lightandfrothies
French
Frodo
Frodo and Friends’ Great Ring Adventure
Frodo is not taking the Ring to the Eye.
Frodo’s Adventures in Mordor
Frodo's pillow is named Rhordail.
Froggie the Bear
Froggy Prince Robert the Hoptoad
Froggy socials
Frozen lemonade
Full moons
Funny cartoons
Galadriel is really, really old. Ok, most people would know this. I'm just reiterating a point Melissa made.
Galahad
Gandalf attempting to poison Pippin in a piece of Bilbo's birthday cake. "I think you have Pippin's piece, so be careful."
Gandalf has it out for Pippin.
Gandalf missed the boat.
Gas station cappuccinos
Gegolas and Limli
German professors
Getting caught in the rain
Getting lost in Columbus
Giant Crane
Giant dragonflies
Gibbous moons
Giggling during parts of Phantom of the Opera that are not funny at all
Giggling men
Gilgamesh *snap snap* and Enkidu
Giving Robert Smith a hug
Glow-in-the-dark bracelets
Glow-in-the-dark earrings
Go back to Texas!
Go now! Go now!
Go to town
God needs to push the Easy Button
Going 24 hours on nothing but coffee
Going through the checkout with a single black boy’s t-shirt and one pack of Batman cards
Good morning, Starshine! The earth says Hello!
Good spirits
Good, long books
Goodnight…and goodbye…
Got it!
Graduating
Grammar
Grody boys
Grodyness
Grouse
Guitars
Guys in eyeliner
Haircuts
Han Solo
Happy Beatle
Harry Potter
Harry Potter is beautiful and intense and there's nothing you can do about it
Have you ever been to Outback before?
Having Dr. LaCour appear almost as many times as Dr. Crane on this list
Having to request to be on The List
He’s fearful—he scared the Batman!
He’s not faking, not that one.
Healthy body, healthy mind!
HearT attack
Hedgehog incident
Hedgehogs
Heh heh heh
Hello, Poppet!
Hey, hey! John Peru / Everyone’s in love with you! / What’s a man like you to do? / John Peru! John Peru!
Hey. Hey guys.
Hiding in closets
His little blue suit!
Hmmm….Crane….
Hobbit Cakes
Hobbits
Holy schnap
Hop-toads
Hugging Dr. LaCour
Hugging Zach. Forever.
Hugs
Humphrey
Hushing Melissa’s brother when he spoke during The Good Doctor’s lines
I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together
I bought you bath crayons because I wuv you!
I can smile. I smile good. I smile real good.
I can wear whatever the hell I want. I have a tattoo of a cobra on my arm.
I can’t believe you told Melissa about the cappuccino machine!
I do this with all my friends
I don’t believe in giant bats.
I don’t speak your language
I forgot to get directions!
I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!
I have my memoir!
I know for a fact there aren’t any in there.
I like Crane
I like that plan.
I love the Cure
I love those guys!
I never said you did!
I only watch dark movies, like the Corpse Bride…hahaha
I rather like…
I saw them drinking out of Coffee and Crane cups!
I suppose
I think you have Pippin’s piece…so be careful
I thought you were smarter and cooler than the other girls!
I told him, “Mama…”
I wish I had a girlfriend
I’d never let anyone call me that…
I’ll make it easy…severed
I’ll think of you as a fool!
I’m a Beatle! What are the odds?
I’m Batman / I don’t believe in giant bats / DuCard Card / I’ll think of you as a fool!
I’m Batman.
I’m fond of her, ok?
I’m gonna slap his big head!
I’m not a sweetie-pie! I’m hardcore.
I’ve taken the liberty of getting you a straw
Icarus Archimedes Ignatius Wordsworth Rowling Raoul the Owl
Icarus’ pirate bandana
If it ain’t got trees, it ain’t a proper road.
If it has any existence, it is not in the way that it seems to be referred to, so please refrain from believing that it is.
If Stephanie sends you any interesting emails…
If you play your cards correctly
Imagine my surprise (said as Count Olaf would, of course)
Indicator
Insaaaaaane
Insane group hugs
Interests lists so long they have to be put in the biography box
Interpretate
Interway
Interweb
Is everything all riiiiight?
Japanese baby?
Jason Mmkgnkske
Jenga House
Jenkins
Jenkins the Bear
Jenkins the Car
Jenkins the Star which is really Venus
Jenkins who is Stephanie
Jeremiah at J. C. Penney
Jim
Jim Jenkins
Jim Jenkins Junior
John Peru
Johnny Depp
Jonathan, Jonathan Crane ¯¯
Josh Groban
Keep it gay!
Kisses
Knowing what a Fender Stratocaster is
Lack of any restaurant savvy
Lando Calrissian (sitting next to Melissa in the theatre)
Larry the Leaf
Laughing
Learning how to tie a tie…so that Melissa can wear one
Leave me to my darkness.
Led Zeppelin
Legolas
Legolas being responsible for translating complex Lord of the Rings dialogue for the simpler members of the audience.
Legolas Greenleaf Greenleaf Greenleaf Jenkins, Smo-Master II
Legolas serving as the Fellowship's delegated marshmallow provider.
Lemony Snicket
Letters in the post
Lightandfrothy
Lilac walls
Limericks
Literature
Little driving gloves
Little squeaky voices
Living at the W with Stephanie
Living Diary
Long philosophical discussions at one in the morning
Long silences that aren’t awkward
Looking like we're high at Wal-Mart at 3 in the morning
Lord of the Rings calendars
Lord of the Smo
Lullaby
M&Ms
Ma’am, you don’t have to yell
Mahogany closets
Mais oui? Mais non! Mais je ne sais pas.
Majoring in Stupid
Making fun of Livejournal
Making fun of Livejournal and then deciding that real ones would be ok after all
Mama Jo’s flea market
Mama Raccoons
Marinara Sauce
Marrying Zach
Masquerades
Melissa Medusa Godzilla Patience-Marie Smackms Kmiec the Owl
Melissa’s dad nailing his glove to the roof
Melissa’s Magical Kisses
Melissa’s pink kitty journal
Melissa’s spider ability
Melissa’s...lectures...about Tolkien!
Midnight trips for Harry Potter
Miffle
Might could fly
Milkshakes
Mimes
Mmk at mew dot eddoo
Mmmmmmmmm……Craaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaane
Mocha frappes
Mocha fratte lappe
Monkees…ugh
Monsieur, I bid you welcome
Mood rings
Moody Beatle
Movies that follow you out of the theatre
Mr. Darcy
Mr. Davis’ “diagrams”
Mr. Pudgems
Mrs. Bosarge chastising Sean for not being a gentleman.
Ms. O’Brien what a splendid essay!
Muahahahaha!
Muahashashashashashashasa!
Mum’s the word
Muppet Christmas Carol
Music
Musical birthday candles
Musicals
My coffee isn’t cold enough to melt chocolate
My Fair Lady
My Little Chicken
My spewns are acting up!
Naming elbows Vernon LaCour
Naming knees Betty Sue
Nat King Cole
Nine hour phone conversations
Nine o’clock phone calls
Nine Reasons to Join a Convent
Nine-hundred page mistakes
Nonchalant insanity
Noodle givers
Nora Jones
Not 2,ooo!
Not disappointing Mr. Davis
Now where’d I put that quill
O Canada
Oh no! My schizophrenia is coming back!
Oh, it’s too late. You can’t stop it now.
Old Chap
Old Sport
Oliver the Spider
Omelets
One of the underlying themes of the Lord of the Rings involves carrots.
Our strange duet
Painting Stephanie green to get her into plays
Pants?
Paying $0.33 for dinner at Outback
Pen
Pensive Beatle
Perhaps you should have some…clear your head.
Perry and Mippin
Phone calls
Phone calls at 11:00 at night (from both of you lunatics!!!)
Phonetically transcribed letters
Pink frills
Pink pearls and blue jeans
Pippin’s Piece
Pirate coats
Pirate fantasies
Pirates
Plan B
Plays
Pocket phantom
Poetry
Poor little guy
Poor, fragile man
Popplers
Posters, and lots of them
Pragmatic
Preferring gas station cappuccinos to coffeehouse cappuccinos
Pretty much
Pretzels
Pride and Prejudice
Psycho McGee Lovejoy
Psychopharmacology
Pure logic and emotion
Purple velvet top hats. I just think they’re great.
Quite!
Quotes of death
Quoting movie lines
Raccoon eggs of death
Rainbows
Raman noodles
Randomly speaking Elvish
Raspberry coffee
Really old books!
Red and black stripes
Red lipstick
Referring to some of the Company as Perry and Mippin, Sodo and Fram, and Gegolas and Limli.
Refusing to call Wetzel by his first name because he shares it with The Good Doctor
Renaissance fairs
Re-naming Venus Jenkins with Zach
Rex
Rhordail—there is nothing wrong with naming your pillow. Really! Frodo did it.
Rhymes
Richard Frost
Riddle wrapped in an enigma.
Ridiculously long names
Riiiiight…the poison, the poison for Kuzco, the poison chosen especially to kill Kuzco, Kuzco’s poison. That poison?
Ring" can be replaced by "smo" throughout most of the story.
Ringo poking John with a drumstick
Ringo saying “The Wizard will see you now!”
Ringo Starr and Robert Smith
Ringwraiths are afraid of spoons.
Road trips
Robert Smith
Robert Smith going cuddly
Robert Smith has a butler named Jeeves
Robert Smith singing “Why Can’t I Be You”
Robert Smith’s a cobbler
Robert Smith’s love affair with David Bowie
Robert Smith’s shoes
Rock throwing goons
Roger the Jump-Roping Sheep
Rosy cheeks! Rosy cheeks!
Rustling of trees
Sacagawea Dollar
Sam
Sanctuary
Sang, my Angel!
Sauron is particularly fond of smos.
scarecrow…
Scarecrowe (that’s right…with an ‘e’…)
Scoundrels
Secret Societies
September 22
Severed…the Adventures of John Peru
Sexy guitar playing boys
Shadowfax goes to Valinor with Stephanie.
She laughed herself right off the noodle!
She Wants Revenge
Shiny purple shirts
Shoelacesss, Precious!
Shooting stars
Shopping
Shoulder Angels
Sidewalk chalk
Silmarillion
Singing “Notes” on the Kincannon stairs
Singing everything to “Masquerade”
Sisters Brazil
Sisters Grimm
Sisters Peru
Sitting in the driveway
Sitting on the mailbox
Six minus white
Ski-ball
Skipping
Sleep talking
Sleeping Beauty
Slow motion hugs
Slow, School Zone
Smiley emails
Smoothies
Smos
So, like, what? You’re not paying me to drive around and eat pizza.
So. What’s the most swankified place in town?
Sodo and Fram
Sometimes you're kind of pretty
Sparkling grape juice
Sparkly shoes
Special…projects
Spewns? That sounds like a disease.
Spinach puffs
Spindly
Spunky Dub (I love him, anyway)
Squeak-squeakity-squeak-squeaken
Squirrels
Squishy
Squishy breeches scrunch-scrunch face (pudding cheeks)
Squishy Brian face!
Squishy pandas
Squishy raccoons
Squishy scale
Squishy-ed smiles
SSSH
Stairway to Heaven
Star Wars robots
Star Wars. At midnight. With your brother in costume.
Starbursts
Stars
Stars reflected in the ocean
Staying awake past sunup
Stephanie
Stephanie dropping a peanut in her printer
Stephanie flinging her cutlery
Stephanie, Stephanie Baggins
Stephanie’s car seat
Stephanie’s dad paying for the movie rentals in half dollars
Stephanie’s little brother’s…antics
Stephanie’s smiley, blinky look
Strange turn of events, turns out Gandalf is not Zach's grandfather.
Strawberries and Cream
Strawberry milkshakes
Striped socks
Stuffed owls
Suave
Sub-creation
Sudden wind before a storm
Summertime
Supporting Stephanie during her trial at her grandparents
Swankified
Swimming at night
Swimming in the Deep End
Taco Bell
Take it to lung
Taking a nap in Melissa’s room with Zach
Taking one day to travel from Columbus, MS, to Biloxi, MS, riding Shadowfax.
Talking candy boxes
Test-taking with the pipe
That guy in blue shorts at the movie theatre
That guy? He scares me!
That is a fairy
That is the only possible explanation
That joke you know
That little smirk!
That sounds perfect!
That’s your choice. Goodbye.
The Beatles
The cheese, the bloom, and the coconut shrimp
The Cure
The Easy Button
The Emperor’s New Groove
The Good Doctor
The Killers
The Lord of the Rings
The Mall God
The Phantom of the Opera
The Princess Bride
The Producers
The smell of rain
The sound of a friend’s voice
The U. S. Government is using a chocolate standard
The waterfall makes the chocolate light and frothy
Therapy Thursday
There once was a Doctor named Crane/ Who was nonchalantly insane/ And the Batman—why!/ He’ll scream and he’ll cry/ But the Good Doctor, he doesn’t complain.
This
This road was made by Mississippi hands for Mississippi wheels!
Those little rectangular glasses
Thumbhiking
Ticket master
Tim To Bombadil Baristo
Tiny blue Elven lanterns
Tiny, poisonous elephants
To Kill a Mockingbird: One Woman Show!
Tolkien
Top hats, canes, and traveling the world
Totally
Touch my hand!
Transmerge
Transmerge, dammit!
Trips to Wal-Mart at unusual hours
Trips to Wal-Mart for unusual items
Truly a scoundrel.
T-shirts
Tumbleweed Jack
Uh-uh
Ultra Ulysses
Ulysses the Dancing Monkey
Using the Phantom of the Opera to fill long silences
V for Vendetta speech given by Alex
Vernon in the Sky Avec Diamonds
Videos
Walking in the evenings
Walks on the beach
Walks on the beach under a full moon
Watching LotR FotR together...finally!
We are the Eggmen. They are the Eggmen. We are the Walrus.
We don’t want to hear a song…about the moon!
We have come for the cheesestick.
We have to do something about this Sean character
We lost the car
We’re in agreement, and that’s a good place to be.
Well, we’ll find out—won’t we?
Well-mannered frivolity
What anyone does when a prowler comes around…call the police.
What are the odds?
What is his problem?!
What is that my Elvish ear hears? Can it be—Old Glory?!
What is this background!?
What the hell is that?!
What would Dr. Crane name his pet elephant?
What's getting me is that I could not have been born a chair!
When it’s raining and the sun is shining at once
Whipped cream
Whispering so as not to "wake Stephanie up"
Whoosh
Why does loving you feel so wrong?
Why so silent, good monsieurs?
Wicked
Wiglaf the Pea
Wine
Winking Bats
Wishing we could apparrate
Wooooooo! I got Zach’s pants!
Working in the English Department
Worm of society
Would you like to see my mask?
Writing
Y’all really like your coffee
Yes, he is.
Yes, I suppose that is funny/ And I am glad that you do/ Share we now laughter together? / Yes I’ll laugh with you!
Yesssssss
Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me
You can tell by the stripes
You can’t get in the way of true fond.
You could have been great!
You deserve each other! This hat and you!
You do. You totally do.
You have a purpose: To build a coffee empire…for the criminally insane.
You hit…a cat.
You may think you have control of your mind, which you do…
You rehearsed the whole night!
You struck scare into my heart
You think you lost your love, well I saw her yesterday…
You will curse the day you did not do…all that the Bighead asked of you!
You’re taking a picture?!
Your army, Helen
Yugi House
Zach crushing Melissa’s hand while napping
Zach hiding his eyes behind his back
Zach wearing Melissa’s pants and Superman shirt
Zach, Melissa, and Stephanie taking a nap in Melissa’s room
Zach’s antics
Zatchary
Zuckerman

Virginia City

Ok, folks. This really isn't back-blogging. I started this the evening we returned from Virginia City, NV, but was much too tired to really write anything significant.

Virginia City is an old mining town, and it has become tourist center extraordinaire. And my brother and I did the tourist thing all the way.

First, we went into a saloon, since Geoffery determined we couldn't have a good time without a significant amount of alcohol in our systems. So we sat in this saloon near a great glass window looking out onto the Nevada foothills, which are beautifully blue mountains, spotted brown and red and green with minerals and powdered with pristine snow.

But back to the saloon: Inside, people were dressed up Old Western, from cowboy hats to spurred boots. I don't know if it's something the locals do for the hell of it, or if people get together on the weekends to amuse the tourists. Either way, they made quite a show out of it, right down to the Western twang in, "Can I get you somethin' to drink?"

We did indeed get something: whiskey. I've had plenty of drinks, but I had never shot whiskey. When Geoff set the glasses down, there was this young man leering at me from across the room. He watched me lift the glass, and I could tell from his face that he didn't think I could do it.

Ha. Easy as can be. Quick, hot, and pleasant. In fact, Geoff--tough sailor man he is--snatched up his cup of coke long before I did. And the doubtful young man? He smiled and nodded. Seems I'd been initiated.

So I shot whiskey in a Western saloon. That should be enough to make my trip to Nevada worthwhile.

We spent the rest of the day photographing the scenery and exploring the shops and museums. These people love Mark Twain. I mean, really love him--he has his own museum and a number of shops. In fact, my brother and I had lunch and a drink at the same bar (right down to the original wood) that Mark Twain and Ulysses S. Grant once frequented when they were in that part of the country.

At the end of the day, Geoff and I had one of those old-timey photos made, the ones where you dress up in period costume, which neither of us had done before. Geoff's wearing some fairly horrible longjohns, and I am holding a rifle to his head. He looks positively terrified, and I look--well, I look pretty damn mean.

We spent the evening watching Law & Order back a Geoff's apartment. Actually, we spent every evening (whether at the apartment or in a hotel) watching Law & Order. SVU has a pretty good cast, by the way. Not so much so with Criminal Intent...but that's neither here nor there.

Anway, that night, we were also preparing for the next day's early departure:

Next stop, Anaheim, California!

!!!

I did it.

I just crashed through my writer's block.

I wrote a ten-page story in one week. ONE WEEK! An all-time record, I think!

So the ending's a bit rushed and the details probably need some fleshing out, but, technically, it is finished....and last night, I fed it to the wolves.